Recognizing Denial

Tags

Blogging, Connecting, Inspirational, Media, Networking, Reflection, Social Media

A few weeks ago, I watched a program on the Dr. Phil show. It presented Sarah Jakes, who is the daughter of T.D. Jakes, one of America’s most beloved ministers to hit the media. At 13 years of age, she became pregnant and became a mother by age 14. She went on to have the baby, graduate from high school, and be accepted into college. However, at 19, she dropped out of college and started to dance nude at a local nightclub. Sarah claimed she had very low self-esteem when younger and any attention was better than no attention at all, no matter how degrading or offensive to her.

This show was meant for me. In fact, it is freeing after over 40 years. I too had very low self-esteem as a young teenager. Making good grades in middle school (practically straight A’s in every subject), my grades started to decline in highschool. What was worse than poor grades, were my parents’ attitude toward me. When I was 13 years of age, I was approached and sexually molested by a family member (not blood-related). My parents tried to keep it quiet and conceal it from the public, but I was psychologically damaged.

Once I told my parents what happened, the response I got was repulsive. “We stopped it,” was the response. The person who victimized me told my mother it was my imagination as if I made up the whole thing. But I did not, and I have a witness to it.

I didn’t get pregnant nor have a baby. Neither did I drop out of college nor dance nude in a nightclub. I did suffer internally for years, sought professional counseling, and even dated and married an attorney. But truth be known, the psychological damage traveled to my marriage. It caused problems with me and my husband. One reason I am divorced today with no children.

I believe I majored in Abnormal Psychology in college to better understand myself and what I was going through at the time. No wonder my self-esteem was so low. I felt like crap. Adults have a hard enough time with sex. Just think about children. They don’t have the maturity or mental capacity to understand fully what is going on, although children are expected to act appropriately.

When your children speak to you, please listen. Don’t shovel it under the rug, as if to hide it. You are only hurting your child more. Be a protective parent. It happened, but I can not change the past. I can only be aware that it does exist and in wonderful families too.

A Moment of Prayer

Tags

Blogging, Connecting, Inspirational, Reflection

My mother was a private person. She would not like this post. But she lived an exemplary life. Her journey came to an end on March 23, 2020, after suffering from a heart attack and internal bleeding. Our family buried her on March 28. Mom taught gifted children in public schools and was extremely smart. Mom was a beautiful lady with a loving kind heart. She always did for her family, spouse, and children. She will be missed.

Today, a second cousin was buried after contracting the coronavirus and passed on April 10. He was of great intellect and a writer as well. His book was translated into German, as well as English. He taught American students of military families while living in Germany. He had served in the American Army in Germany for two years.

During this COVID-19 crisis, we are experiencing social distancing and staying at home. There is a lot less social interaction than usual. But I feel it is a time for prayers and to thank our blessings for what we have. I have much to be thankful for, a wonderful family and others who always lend a helping hand. People have been very kind, dropping off meals at the house and being quite helpful.

More specifically, it enlightens my heart that others are generous, even in challenging times. Please take a moment to say a prayer for all those dealing with the devastation of the coronavirus. Not just for the individuals lost, but for the families dealing with grief and sorrow. These are unusual times, but we can cope by helping each other.

God Bless you and your family. Please stay healthy and safe.

Time of Sorrow

Tags

Blogging, Connecting, Reflection, Spiritual

I lost my sweet mother on Monday, March 23rd. She was 90 years old and lived a good long life, but that doesn’t ease the pain. I am numb and my heart is heavy. Will my heart ever stop hurting?

Mom was a beautiful lady. She was kind and always offered a helping hand to those in need. She will be greatly missed by all. We assume our parents will live forever. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if they did?

With all this rain, I feel tears from heaven, mourning the passing of a wonderful soul. But what makes me feel better is knowing that Mom is in a better place and out of pain. She is no longer suffering. Her spirit lives on and in my heart.

Good Things Are Happening

Tags

Blogging, Connecting, Networking, Social Media, Writing

It’s mighty cold in Atlanta right now. Consistent light showers and misty weather have promoted bitter cold temperatures at night. Hopefully, it won’t snow yet. Well, snow is all right, but no ice.

I’m tooting my own horn, but good things are happening. I’m turning the corner and starting to feel much better within the past two weeks. The physical therapist thinks I am well enough to go to out-patient physical therapy. She assessed me today and dismissed me from home physical therapy.

I saw my neurologist last Wednesday. He is pleased with my progress and how far I’ve come since surgery. I know he’s concerned about the autoimmune part and if surgery will be just as good for the other foot. Christ is good and will see me through the next surgery just as well as my last one. I believe surgery on my right foot will be as well or even better than surgery on my left foot. He wants me to trust Him and is showing me that all things are possible with Him.

In addition, I see my orthopedic surgeon on Monday. I’m to be fitted with a new ankle brace to stabilize my foot. It will help with mobility too. I hope to find out when I can schedule the next surgery on my other foot. Hopefully, by this springtime.

Besides just releasing another published book, Master of Disguise, I’m having a trailer (video) made for Saga of the Ages.  I’m also having it republished in the U.K. These were two of my main goals in writing: to have one of my books made into a script or film one day and to become an international writer. My dreams are becoming realities now. I only have to believe Christ and what He tells me. And believe I will….

Keto and Intermittent Fasting Diet

Tags

Blogging, Connecting, Inspirational, Media, Networking, Reflection, Social Media

I was introduced to a new health diet early last month. It was a concept by Dr. Eric Berg to reverse autoimmune diseases. Some might be familiar with the Keto and Intermittent Fasting diet. Both are important facets of the diet. It is designed on consuming high fats, low carbs and no sugars or grains. Dr. Berg’s concept is that the body will start attacking the animal fat cells instead of one’s own cells. It is a process of decoying the body’s own defenses.

My sister Janice has been sending me links of videos on Youtube from Dr. Eric Berg. He is known internationally for his concept of Ketosis and the adrenal glands of the liver. He talks about high insulin levels around the stomach and how it relates to belly fat. That is my problem area too, especially my sides. You can find information on the Keto and Intermittent Fasting diet by clicking https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3w193M5tYPJqF0Hi-7U-2g

FYI, I have lost several pounds within two months, ever since beginning the diet. It is not only designed for autoimmune disorders, it is for those that have other medical conditions (e.g., cancer, arthritis, kidney, thyroid, heart) or want to lose excess weight. I’m not advocating to try the Keto diet. I’m not a medical doctor nor can I give medical advice. I only know how it makes me feel – better and more energy. I usually fast 15 to 18 hours three to four days per week for the autoimmune illness. I never go past 20 hours fasting at one time, although I might try it soon. You can have some liquids during this fasting time (e.g., black coffee, tea, water, bone broth or unsweetened almond milk). The longer the body does fast without food, the more the body begins to heal itself.

DETOX: Dr. Berg recommends detoxifying the body of impurities and toxins daily. It also hastens the healing process and promotes weight loss as you diet. His focus goes for a 21-day cycle, however, I do it daily. There is a mixture of one glass water (filtered or tap), one tbsp apple cider vinegar and one tbsp lemon juice to drink three times a day.

FOODS TO AVOID: While enjoying various foods, there are foods high in carbs and sugar to avoid, such as bananas, kiwi, apples, pineapple, and peaches. For a list of restricted foods, please see the 14 worst foods to eat on a Ketogenic-diet at http://health.facty.com/food/nutrition/the-14-worst-foods-to-eat-on-a-ketogenic-diet/

Dr. Eric Berg also has a pamphlet that explains the dos and don’ts while on the Ketosis diet. Amazon offers Kindle as well. Please see https://shop.drberg.com/checkout/cart/ for any questions you might have.

Plus, Dr. Berg offers many products on his website to take daily. I especially like the nutritional yeast (powder). It comes in two forms: pills and powder. I am allergic to pill form and the powder tastes just like cheese. It takes two tbsp a day sprinkled on food or mixed in a drink and it also helps headaches. Two more supplements I take is Keto MCT Oil Powder – available unflavored, vanilla and chocolate. I love the chocolate – tastes just like cocoa. One big scoop is good with a eight-ounce glass of almond milk. It is delicious. Also, I take Electrolytes with MCT daily. It comes unflavored and one small scoop taken per meal.

Please be advised that the weight will take time to gradually come off. But it will eventually start coming off. Mine started around 4 weeks and now at my sixth week, I am really starting to lose weight. Be patient with it and yourself. You want to lose weight slowly instead of fast to prevent sudden (quirks) weight gain.

Several months ago, I weighed 145 pounds. I went down to 137 to 139 pounds a few months ago. Getting on the weight scales this morning, I weighed 129 pounds. I will continue to lose a few more pounds to cushion myself and then maintain a balanced diet. It is a lifechange and a lifestyle diet, not just a temporary diet. It is not designed for quick fixes, like losing weight for a class reunion or a social event. I’m on the diet not only for health reasons, but to save my life. I’m fighting for my life and to become healthy.

Tips for New Writers and Authors – Week Ten: Wrapping Up

Tags

Advertising, Authors, Blogging, Books, Connecting, Creativity, Fiction, Marketing, Media, Networking, Non-Fiction, Novels, Promoting, Reading, Social Media, Writers, Writing

This is the tenth and final week I will be presenting tips to new writers and authors. I hope the ten weekly posts were helpful and something you can come back to. At least, it gives you an idea of what to expect in the publishing world. As reiterated many times, no course or book can teach you everything to learn about publishing. Practical experience and recognition as an author and writer are the best teachers.

A good writer knows how to write. A great writer not only knows how to write well, but will give direction and guidance to others. This advice is offered freely. I don’t proclaim to be an expert; I still have lots to learn too.

Five years of writing and publishing led me down this path. A path I did not choose; it chose me. To wrap up this week, I offer several suggestions:

1. Look at alternate publishers before you select a publisher. Do your research beforehand and ask questions. You might find another publisher who does work less expensively than another and/or you get more profits (including royalties) from book sales.
2. Remember to get everything you expect in writing before you sign a contract. If not in writing, then it is your word against the publisher or marketer. Once you sign a contract, you are bound to their regulations and procedures. Legally, you usually have 7 to 10 days to cancel the contract.
3. Talk to your book consultant if any questions about the publishing process. Usually, they can advise about complimentary copies of your book(s) or marketing services offered. *Note – I find marketing services to be more expensive than publishing sometimes, depending on the service offered, so choose wisely. This seems true for self-publishing, as well as traditional publishing.
4. Please note that once you publish a book, you are placed on a calling list. If it gets too annoying, you may want to ask the publisher to be removed from the list. If they say the list came from a website like Amazon, please ask to be connected to their customer service or a manager.
5. Continue to market your book(s) online. Social media is a great way to advertise your book(s) online and very affordable. Shout my Book will market your book(s) on social media inexpensively. They will do as many books as you want daily or monthly (at a small fee, of course).
6. Keep in contact with other writers. Seek a writer’s group or an organization for writers that meet monthly to discuss their books. This is an excellent opportunity to not only do some advertising, but to get advice from other writers.
7. Keep getting your name out there – mail book markers, postcards or business cards to potential interested readers, like family, acquaintances or friends. This can get expensive with postage and takes time; however, it’s gets your name and title of your book(s) out to the mainstream public.
8. Ask businesses (depending on the type of business) that know you if they would post a flyer of your book on their window. Usually, it is best if you are a customer or they’re acquainted with you.
9. In retrospect, see if these businesses would let you market your book(s) through a book signing. You would be surprise. They might say yes.
10. Keep hanging in there – never give up. Enjoy the writing process as you write that next “best seller” one day.  Simply, just have fun with it.

There are many more suggestions, but I feel it would be too repetitious in words. This project started out as your idea, your creation and your book. It is your baby. When I publish a book, I feel like I have given birth to a new creation.

Please keep in touch and if you have any questions, I am here to help. I may not be able to answer all your questions, but I will attempt to find out the answer for you. In the meantime, have a wonderful week and hope to be reading your best-seller soon.

 

Tips for New Writers and Authors – Week Nine: On Your Way!

Tags

Advertising, Authors, Blogging, Books, Connecting, Decison-Making, Marketing, Media, Networking, Social Media, Writers, Writing

For new writers, it is an uncertain destiny. You’ve written and published your first book. Where do you go from here?  Often, it is soul-searching. Remembering back to when I first began to write books, I was mystified as to which direction to go toward. It wasn’t much longer, that I wrote another book. From then on, I was hooked and started writing my third book shortly afterward.

I would suggest to just enjoy the ride. It is hard work to constantly monitor your book sales, but being well-organized is half the battle. Whatever you do, it is important to stay upbeat and positive in the process. Your door will open oneday. It is also important to never give up! If writing is your passion and you love writing, stick with it, no matter what anybody says. After all, it is your life. Nobody else can live it for you.

Again, as previously mentioned, no course taught me these things. Rather, it was hands-on experience over time. I offer several suggestions for new writers and authors, which I feel may benefit you:

1. Seek out other writers and authors both in social media and the community. The more you reach out to others, the more your writing skills are recognized. In this case, a monthly writers’ group would benefit, as they offer advice to new writers.
2. Do some self-marketing and advertising. Everywhere I go, from restaurants to social events, I give at least one person my business card. It identifies you as a writer and where to find your book(s) online or publisher.
3. Acknowledge that your book(s) will not sell overnight. Rather, it will take time and effort to build up an audience of interested readers.
4. Establish yourself in your local community before spanning out to other areas. People will usually purchase something from someone they know or acquainted with, rather than a complete stranger.
5. Do not get discouraged. It is easy to find discouragement along the way. Remember that there are thousands of writers competing against you for recognition and notiety.
6. Keep your communication lines open. You never want to give all your personal information online. If you have an author’s website, that should give interested readers enough information to purchase your book(s). If using social media, like Twitter, Facebook or Google, set up a paypal or method that readers can purchase your book(s).
7. Always look for alternate ways to market your book(s), such as online campaign ads or newspaper ads. You never know when literary agents, publishers and marketers might find interest in your book(s).
8. Constantly look out for conferences or meetings in the community. There are some organizations that allow new writers to speak to their members. Contact local organizations to see when their next meeting is. Introduce yourself and that you are a new writer in the local area. You can also check with local bookstores for booksignings.

Next week, I will be wrapping up my weekly postings. I will be discussing how to expand your horizons into other areas of writing. More importantly, how to write and get paid for it.

 

Tips for New Writers and Authors – Week Eight: Branding Yourself as an Author

Tags

Advertising, Authors, Blogging, Connecting, Media, Networking, Promoting, Social Media, Writers, Writing

What does branding mean? I don’t mean branding like cattle. “Branding” is identifying yourself as unique that sets you apart from other authors. The key is developing a brand that is targeted and focused. You need to determine what genre and style of writing you want to go with among your readers. For example, five years ago, I started out writing nonfiction books. By the third book, I changed to fiction. My last several books have been historical novels, based on actual events, but the characters are fictitious. The readers will be more impressed if you identify with one genre or style. If you are enthusiastic about science fiction, branding yourself to science fiction books goes further than skimming around genres. If you love poetry and poems, establishing yourself as a poet is beneficial. If you love children’s books, then establishing yourself as a writer of children’s books or educational books is essential.

As a new writer, it is important that you establish yourself as early as possible in a particular brand. Once recognized on social media, your name will go a long way. The more your name is put out there, the more you are recognized. It is more than social media and online advertising. It is actually getting out in the community and marketing yourself as a writer/author. I started off with a pen name and changed it to my legal name later on. Why? Upon the advice of the publisher, my first two books were more on a personal nature and self-closure. I didn’t want personal confidentiality to get out to the mainstream public. I did that to protect my family and family members. But on the lighter spectrum, it allowed me to self-heal on the inside.

So, how do I get started as a new writer/author? I had issues with establishing myself as a writer/author of multiple books. Mine are mostly because of health/medical issues, but you are a young writer, trying to establish yourself in the community. My suggestion is to simply get out there. Pass your business cards around. Take extra cards with you to everywhere you visit. Remember, people will tend to buy books from someone they know or recognize rather than a total stranger. The very first thing is to listen to Sherry Beck Paprocki’s, author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Branding Yourself. She provides a video on UTube that defines a branding story and how you can develop your own story. Stephen Hertz, managing director of interactive at Lavidge, offers four tips to authors who are new to social media. These tips help to get new authors started on social media.

1. Claim your social profiles on all of the high traffic platforms, such as Facebook, Twitter and Linkedin. It is important to register your information, no matter how active you are on each.
2. Start out with short and simple posts so that you don’t overwhelm your readers or yourself. I realize that writers like to write, but remember less is more in this case.
3. Find your biggest supporters on each platform and reach out to them for advice on the best way to approach that specific platform.
4. Actively seek out feedback from your community of followers. This helps keep them engaged while providing you with valuable insights.

Next week, I will discuss scouting out different avenues of writing. Perhaps, you have decided in midstream to go from creative writing to free-lance writing. How do you get started? There are different avenues to consider and ways that you are even paid to write. Please stop in next week and you might find your answer. In the meantime, have a good weekend and enjoy this beautiful, sunny weather today.

 

Tips for New Writers and Authors – Week Six: What Comes Next?

Tags

Advertising, Blogging, Connecting, Marketing, Media, Social Media, Writers

You worked hard on your manuscript. It has been submitted to the publisher. If you are self-publishing, it generally takes two to three weeks to publish. Your book is first submitted to a check-in book coordinator. Once the content of your manuscript is approved (usually 24 to 48 hours), it goes into the design stage. This is when your front and back covers are designed and the interior text as well. This stage can last up until you finish all corrections or revisions of your final manuscript. Once you have made corrections and revisions (if any), you will approve the final layouts of the covers and text. Your book then goes into the production stage, whereby it is ready for the printers. This stage takes anywhere from a week to two weeks usually. Once completed, you will be sent a complimentary copy or copies of your newly published book. This is your time to start promoting your book. We have covered many of the marketing strategies in the previous week. There are some suggestions that you might find effective doing this time:

1. Promote your new book through word of mouth to acquaintance, friends and family members. They are most familiar with your written work and writing skills.
2. Network an interest to readers through your blog, social media (Twitter, Facebook, Google, etc) or email.
3. Set up a time at a local book store to introduce yourself as a new author. You can usually email to set up a time and date.
4. Book signings are important as it introduces you as a new writer/author to the community. Set up a time and date through advertising and/or a local newspaper – it will also promote book sales.
5. Advertise your new book in the local newspaper. You can contact the newspaper for costs. Usually, week-long ads will be more costly. It may be more cost-effective to set up once monthly or weekends only.
6. Send an article about yourself and writing experience with a photo to the local newspaper. This could be less costly than advertising your book.
7. Look at local organizations and clubs for times to speak about your book. This gives an outlet to be recognized in your community as a new writer/author.
8. Explore radio stations to set up an interview talking about your book. Be adamant and set up a time and date.
9. Set up an author’s website with your new book. You can add additional books as well. Ask the publisher if they have this marketing service.
10. Marketing is costly, but you may want to ask the publisher about online campaign ads.
11. Find other local writers and authors in the area by joining a writers’ club. They meet monthly and offer advice to new writers and authors. In addition, you get to meet others that share your same passion of writing.
12. If you received a marketing kit from the publisher, send out postcards to persons that might be interested in your new book.

As always, do your homework beforehand. I like to research online before starting a project. Next week, I will be discussing some differences between independent publishing and traditional publishing. Seems like a broken record, but it is valuable to you as a new writer and author.

Hell of a Week (Excuse My French)

Tags

Blogging, Connecting, Media, Networking, Social Media

Actually, it has been a fairly decent week, except for a technical computer problem. In addition, I’m trying to resolve some driveway issues for my conversion van. It scrapes every time I drive out of the driveway. The van is low and I have a steep incline at the end of the driveway. I went by the van dealership a couple of days ago. The service manager said putting bigger tires on the van would disturb the balance and effect the speedometer. He didn’t recommend it.

I’ve tried several times ever since I bought the van last November, to fix the problem. I’ve been told different things by different people. This guy on Thursday seemed genuine though. Anyway, my brother-in-law who is an auto parts supervisor, agrees that bigger tires wouldn’t help so much, so another solution – fixing the driveway. Taking up the asphalt and then concrete the driveway to a gradual incline to the road. Concrete is a lot cheaper than asphalt too.

I feel auto garages and shops think women know absolutely nothing about the mechanics of cars. Maybe some don’t, but I know some that do. I don’t know that much about mechanics, but I do know there is a problem. Have I been lied to? It makes one feel vulnerable or perhaps even stupid. The only thing I can do is report the dealership to BBB. I’m not a woman liberator or a feminist by any means; I just like thinking for myself. But I do admit, sometimes it is wise to get another opinion.

On the brighter side, I’ve finished publishing a book three weeks ago and starting to work on another one this week. It is a gradual process. I see what can be accomplished if you put your mind to it. I’m looking into different directions. I’m about to start a new introductory course on screenwriting. I will see how it works, the graphics and linguistics, to coordinate a script. Stephen King’s On Writing, advises that writers finish a script within 90 days. I predict the first script will be my worst.

There are some opportunities coming up. I will be selling my books at the spring festival at Roselawn in Cartersville on Saturday, May 5th and Sunday, May 6th. In addition, I will be speaking to the Georgia Retired Teachers Association of Cobb County this summer. I am adding online advertisements on my books on Amazon and Ingram, in marketing my two latest books. It will be easier for the reader to click online and connect to my author website.  My website is also linked to my blog, as well as a webpage on Facebook and Twitter – please like my page. Any other ideas on social media marketing are highly appreciated. I’m not interest in telemarketers, but genuine marketers to help promote my books, even a literary agent.

Please have a good week everyone. Suppose to rain here in Atlanta tomorrow. We need it to wash all this pollen away. My van looks green. Whatever you do, make life an adventure and always strive to be happy. It’s the secret to a successful and healthy lifestyle. Many blessings to all.